The Bionic Woman Sucks, How To Fix It
October 29th, 2007 by 2xKnight
I was pretty happy when I heard the people from the new Battlestar Galatica were involved with bringing back the Bionic Woman. They did an excellent job with Battlestar after all. The new Galatica is one of the best shows on television. So I was pretty surprised when I didn’t like the new Bionic Woman. After watching the episodes so far, I think I know why it sucks. I also know how to fix it.
Bionic Backbone
Jaime Sommers is the biggest problem with the show. Not the actress playing Jaime, the character itself is bad. I’m sure Michelle Ryan could play a great Jaime Sommers, it’s the creative team behind the camera that won’t let her. The main character is saddled with problems that are supposed to make her human. They don’t, they make her dull.
The web site for the show says “Ultimately, it’s Jaime’s journey of self-discovery and inner strength that will help her embrace her new life as the Bionic Woman…”, but that’s inaccurate. She has no inner strength. Sure she can leap 50 feet into the air and punch through a brick wall, but she can’t stand up to her little sister. Her dealings with the shady agency she’s now working for aren’t any better. One minute she seems like she’s standing up for herself and the next she’s slinking off to do whatever they tell her to. She had her legs and right arm replaced. What she needs is a backbone.
Starbuck is a Cylon
Wait, wrong show. Katee Sackhoff plays Sarah Corvus, the first Bionic Woman. Unfortunately she’s gone just a tiny bit crazy. Bad for her, great for the viewers. Sarah is almost the only thing that makes this show tolerable. Seriously, I barely pay attention when she isn’t involved.
If the creators want this show to be any good at all they’ll surprise everyone and kill off Jaime Sommers switch focus to Sarah Corvus and pretend like they planned it that way. That would be talked about across the country the next day and the following episode would be at the top of the ratings. They could even have some fun with the press. “Hey, the name of the show is Bionic Woman, not Jaime Sommers, Bionic Woman. Sarah Corvus is Bionic. Sarah Corvus is a Woman. She was the star all along.”
Will they do that? Not likely.
Will the show get better? Also not very likely.
: Fandoms, TV, Sci-Fi, Action, NBC, Bionic Woman, Jaime Sommers, Michelle Ryan, Sarah Corvus, Katee Sackhoff 
I agree. I’ve been watching the show since the beginning. We tevo it. Haa. Anyways, I keep hoping their just laying the groundwork for her to be bad A&* . Right now there’s not enough action. Too many drama storylines, like watching a soap opera.
The main reason that the original two bionic series eventually failed was because little kids couldn’t make the ‘bionic sound’ with their mouths.
Really? I had no idea.
I’d kinda like to see a new Six Million Dollar Man, but with inflation and all he’d probably cost Six Hundred Billion Dollars and his tech support would be outsourced to India.
Decent impression of a midwest accent
Tech Support: “Hello, my name is Bill. What can I help you with?”
Six Hundred Billion Dollar Man: “Yeah, I’m fighting bigfoot and my bionic arm is acting up.”
TS: “What seems to be the problem?”
SHBDM: “It usually goes nehnehnehnehneh, but now it’s making a wshwshwshwshwsh sound.”
TS: “Have you tried unplugging it?”
SHBDM: “Ummm, no. It’s my dang arm.”
TS: I’m sorry sir, I can’t help you if you have that sort of attitude.”
click
I too had high hopes for this show. Jaime Somers is just not likable. I don’t see her as a strong butt kicking government agent. She is more like a daytime drama with very little butt-kicking in her artificial dna. The makers of this show have done what they did with last season of Battlestar Galactica - low ball the effects to save money and give you more soap opera than sci-fi.